Brodigan - August 04, 2021 at 09:40AM
Reality makes satire difficult these days. It's hard to make absurd observations when what you're observing is already absurd. For example, no sooner does comedian Ryan Long release a video on how white women can rationalize anything do we have a white woman rationalizing Andrew Cuomo being a sexually harassing deviant.
It was revealed on Wednesday that Andrew Cuomo, as well as his idiot brother Chris, are in fact the garbage humans. According to this blonder number, Andy isn't to blame for not keeping his hands to himself. The fault lies with all you horny Cuomosexuals.
If it wasn't for us f*cking ladies (pause for effect) sexualizing the g*ddamned man throughout the entire pandemic. And referring to him as a Cuomosexual ...
Quick fact-checking. Andrew Cuomo wasn't the Cuomosexual. Those were the people wearing panties with his name covering their fun parts. Cuomo was just the guy with the blood of tens of thousands MeMaws and Pop-Pops on his hands.
It set him up. It set him up to think it was okay to flirt. Considering us - all women - were swooning over the man.
It's a sad day in Gotham when Bill deBlasio comes across as the rational one.
The problem wasn't Cuomo thinking it was okay to flirt. The problem was Cuomo thinking it was okay to reach up someone's blouse and getting grabby with her chesticles. Allegedly. He wasn't hitting on sexually frustrated middle-aged broads who watched his press conferences with their shower massager handy. He was hitting on his AIDES. People who were his subordinates. People who, according to the report, feared retaliation if they turned him down or told anyone. THAT'S the problem. Not someone who walked up to him at a cocktail lounge and whispered "talk PCR test to me" in his ear.
Also, Cuomo wasn't the only one who was getting sexualized. Women (and some men) were getting hot and bothered over every official who said the opposite of Donald Trump. Gavin Newsom. Anthony Fauci. Hell, I probably could have gotten some ass if I attacked Trump enough. The same people fantasizing about Andrew Cuomo were having the same fantasies about Tony Fauci. In some disturbing cases, both IN the same fantasy. Yet Tony Fauci never asked an aide if she was able to get sexually aroused after being raped.
So, no. It's not the fault of people throwing themselves and Andrew Cuomo for why he sexually harassed them. It's just Andrew Cuomo being a scumbag.
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