Brodigan - June 05, 2021 at 07:06AM
People boarding a flight out of Los Angeles for Nashville were most likely expecting a relaxing getaway. Maybe enjoy some country music. Or get blackout drunk with the rest of the bridesmaids and woo girls. I doubt anyone was expecting to see a rodeo live, on the plane, and at 25,000 feet. Yet that's what happened when some schmuck tried to breach the cockpit.
Details are sketchy, and the story is peaced together from Twitter. I'm just happy to write a "flying the friendly skies" story that doesn't involve harassing three-year-olds or complaining about legislation no one read. What we know is an unidentified man, for whatever reason thought twenty years was long enough between airplane highjackings. Friday was going to be his turn! He wasn't expecting to be on a flight with the world's most badass flight attendant. The would-be highjacker was promptly dropped and put down like a wild animal.
Passengers joined in the fun, and the flight had to be diverted to New Mexico.
Upon landing, our jackass friend here was handed off to the FBI, who assure us there was no public threat "at this time."
Still no word on motive. The suspect could have just been a drunken buffoon who got double-dog dared by his bros to run in the cockpit, demand a pair of those plastic wings they give children, and scream "D*CKS OUT FOR HARAMBE" at the co-pilot. Or, praising Allah could have been involved. We at least know the suspect was not wearing a MAGA hat, because then his name would be all over CNN.
Thankfully, because of a flight attendant treating the failed highjacker like Samuel L. Jackson treats snakes, we didn't find out the hard way. The flight attendant better not be paying for drinks for the rest of the summer.
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from Steven Crowder Says
