Brodigan - November 16, 2021 at 07:41AM
A quick-thinking taxi driver prevented what could have been a massive terror attack in Liverpool. David Perry, who hopefully wore his brown pants to work, locked a would-be suicide bomber in the back seat of his taxi. So, instead of blowing lots of people up, the bomber only blew himself up. No doubt the bomber is somewhere being told by 72 different virgins they only like him as a friend.
But first, the explosion. This was supposed to be at a Remembrance Day service.
According to The Daily Mail, Perry was driving his cab. He picked up ... let's just call him Bob the Terrorist. Bob the Terrorist asked to go to a local church, where 1200 military personnel and their families were taking part in a Remembrance Day service. Traffic was really heavy that day. Bob the Terrorist changed his mind and asked to go to the local women's hospital instead.
Perry, as they were pulling up to the hospital, noticed something was off. Bob the Terrorist was messing around with a light that was attached to his jacket. It didn't look right. I'm sure Bob the Terrorist changing location from the church to the hospital seemed odd too. With split-second timing, Perry jumped out of the car and locked the door. I'd like to think his eyes met with Bob the Terrorist's eyes one last time, as Perry gave him the middle finger.
Three other men have been arrested in connection with what's being called an Islamic terror attack. David Perry outside of needing his eardrum stitched up, only suffered minor cuts and bruises. Perry is, if I were to guess, at least eight pints of lukewarm lager in and will not be paying for a drink for the rest of the year.
Bob the Terrorist is getting friend-zoned by seventy-two different virgins. Either that, or all seventy-two virgins look like Bob's sister with the unibrow, and they're horny. Either way, good riddance to Bob the Terrorist.
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