Wednesday, December 30, 2020

Top 5 Mask Nazis of 2020

Top 5 Mask Nazis of 2020
Brodigan - December 30, 2020 at 08:00AM


2020 introduced us to many new phrases. Curbside pickup. Zoom Happy Hour. Peaceful protester. But a personal favorite of mine is the mask nazi. It's a niche genre. These are the masked bandits who wild out on people not being masked up in public places. I'm not calling them Hitler bad. Think more the Soup Nazi from Seinfeld. Though I'm sure if some of the people could have you thrown into a camp, they would.

We've had many a laugh at the expense of mask nazis. I've narrowed it down to my five favorites. Honorable mention goes to the kid who wanted to wear a Hooters mask to the fifth grade. Obviously, he's not the villain in the story. The mask nazis would be the people wanting to stifle his freedom of expression. But I felt he deserved a shout-out.

We'll start with this guy, who is mask nazi'ing all wrong. He's outdoors in the middle of nowhere. He's yelling at maskless hikers who are hiking in the middle of nowhere. Also, he's not wearing a mask himself. Bonus douche points for trying to give others COVID.

Legs here is a more recent one. What I like here isn't so much him being a batsh!t crazy wackadoodle. But because it took place in December — nine months after fifteen days to flatten the curve — no one came to his aid. If anything, the other masked people were defending the maskless woman. Because we're all tired of people like this.

We go back to the great outdoors, where a mask nazi was expecting someone to be wearing a mask while eating a burrito. Words were yelled. Coffee was thrown. But the highlight is when the maskless burrito eater stood up and beat the crap out of the mask nazi's boyfriend. Who then called the cops like a little b*tch.

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